Cuddling my boys has never meant so much. I miss their stories about soccer, friends and computer games.  I miss their noise. I even miss their fighting. 


Hospital stays  with Ruby can be long which means we don’t get to see our boys. 

We talk about them all day. We see them on FaceTime. A quick visit on the weekend or after school or activities. But not enough and it hurts. 

I miss the bed time ritual of reading Tommy aged 7 a story and chatting to Max aged 11 and Will aged 9 about their days. I even miss the million ‘Shhh’ sounds I would hear myself say over and over as they continue to chat well beyond lights out. 

All that was once mundane. I now realise mundane is actually another word for special or wonderful. The normal ‘hum drum’ of my day is what I miss most.  

I miss my boys. Ruby does too. Love you so much Max Will and Tommy. You are incredible brothers and sons and boys and Ruby and I can’t wait to smell your farts when we get home! 


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